Ezer Kenego-or

Eve is given to Adam as his ezer kenegdo—or as many translations have it, his “help meet” or “helper.” Doesn’t sound like much, does it? It makes me think of Hamburger Helper. But Robert Alter says this is “a notoriously difficult word to translate.” It means something far more powerful than just “helper”; it means “lifesaver.” The phrase is only used elsewhere of God, when you need him to come through for you desperately. “There is no one like the God of Jeshurun, who rides on the heavens to help you” (Deut. 33:26). Eve is a life giver; she is Adam’s ally. It is to both of them that the charter for adventure is given. It will take both of them to sustain life. And they will both need to fight together.

Eve is deceived . . . and rather easily, as my friend Jan Meyers points out. In The Allure of Hope, Jan says, “Eve was convinced that God was withholding something from her.” Not even the extravagance of Eden could convince her that God’s heart is good. “When Eve was [deceived], the artistry of being a woman took a fateful dive into the barren places of control and loneliness.” Now every daughter of Eve wants to “control her surroundings, her relationships, her God.” No longer is she vulnerable; now she will be grasping. No longer does she want simply to share in the adventure; now she wants to control it. And as for her beauty, she either hides it in fear and anger, or she uses it to secure her place in the world. “In our fear that no one will speak on our behalf or protect us or fight for us, we start to recreate both ourselves and our role in the story. We manipulate our surroundings so we don’t feel so defenseless.” Fallen Eve either becomes rigid or clingy. Put simply, Eve is no longer simply inviting. She is either hiding in busyness or demanding that Adam come through for her; usually, an odd combination of both.

New Site

Hey guys,

I created a new site to center around the book I want to write. It'll be tuned more toward the theme of Finding our dreams. I wanted to create a blog/site that was more professional looking so that I can eventually sell my ebook! =) Do look out for it! Haha.

You can find it at Dreams of Your Heart. Do visit it; I'll update it more often than this blog, and with more quality content la. Sorry for making navigation so difficult. Ha.

I think I'll take about 6 months for ebook to be finally out. You can never rush a writer. Heh.

Personality Test

Do test at http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love:

You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:

Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.
What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.
Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

Book Outline

Here's a more detailed outline of what i wanna write. Do give comments! =

Objectives of Each Chapter (What do I want to tell people?)

1. Your Dreams
a. Help people understand that God made everyone with a destiny for their lives
b. Our dreams are our God-given call; it’s not a feel good thing, but a question of obedience that we follow
c. That dreams are the only journey you will really take; the rest are just detours

2. The God who believes in you
a. God wants to be involved in you achieving your dreams
b. He wants the best for your life; he wants you to have abundant life
c. He knows what you are capable of; He sees your potential
d. That whatever you truly desire, God wants to give it to you

3. The Holy Spirit who guides you
a. The Holy Spirit is our partner in life
b. He is the one that can give us our true dreams
c. We need to fellowship and listen to the Holy Spirit for our call

4. The Culture of this World
a. That there is a lot of noise in this world
b. These is intense pressure to conform
c. The culture of any place is the strongest hindrance to our call

5. Entering into True Desire
a. Desire is the Christian way of living
b. The danger of Pharsical Christianity
c. Addictions are caused by our hearts not recognizing true desire
d. It’s only when we are close to God will we understand what we truly want

6. Your Time of Solitude
a. You need to be alone with God to discover your call
b. Your time of solitude helps you find clarity in your vision
c. You need to take solitude breaks once in a while

7. The Fellowships of the heart
a. You need intimate allies to go with you on this journey
b. You need friends to know you deep and friends who can fight for you
c. You cannot achieve your dreams alone

8. Keeping Heart till the End
a. We need to preserve till the very end
b. We will meet obstacles, distractions along the way
c. We must discipline ourselves to ‘set our face like a flint’

9. At the Very End
a. When we stand before God, our rewards will be based on what we did in accordance to God’s call
b. We must be fruitful for the right things, because at the end, 80% of the things we do may be counted for nothing.

I wanna write a book.

I've been wanting to start writing a Christian book about following your heart and seeking God for our call in life.

I've come up with some chapters which I can start with; I noticed I write alot about similar topics, so I might as well go write a book about it.

I seem to be called to writing somehow; considering the no. of things I do that concern writing.

1. Blog
2. Uni-Y Newsletters
3. website http://www.leadership-with-you.com

and I think alot.

Did I mention one of my goals was to write a Christian book by 30? Maybe I'll do by this year! =)

But book projects; at least good ones take really long. But I shall stop trying to be perfect and start anyway.

I wrote out a possible chapters for the books:
1. Your dreams
2. The God who believes in you
3. The Holy Spirit that guides you
4. The culture of this world
5. Entering into true desire
6. Your time of solitude
7. The fellowships of the heart
8. Keeping heart till the end
9. At the very end (when we stand before God)

9 chapters. =) Let's go!

Life as it was meant to be.

And we're so far from it.

I hate it when I miss my prayer time in the morning/night.

Every so often in SMU, I walk up to a person and want to talk to the person; but pretty often its:" Sorry, I've gotta go do something" or "I've got some work to do."

We miss that vital connection that all of us long for. The only thing we can say about our lives is "busy."

We're busy.

We're so far from what life was meant to be. A life defined by rich, deep, meaningful relationships.

But one day, we will know each other as it had always meant to be. Our yearning to be known will be met.

The biggest battle of all.

The most monumental battle looms in the distance.

Above all the battles men have fought; crossing the North Altantic, scaling Mount Everest, charging the beaches of Normandy, there's one above all of them.

I must die. Death isn't an option.

The more I hold on to the fear, the more I will fail.

There is a time in every man's life that this battle comes along; we can choose to preserve ourselves, or have our lives spilled out in spectacular sacrifice.

Many choose the easy way, by not fighting this battle, to preserve themselves, that they never have to face the deepest question of their heart : Do I have what it takes?

Yet, I don't want the easy way. God help me. I want to die to myself.

I want to die that I may live.

God help me to fight this one; above all the battles I fought, this is the biggest one ever. And it might stay the biggest one ever.

What do you do if something you wanted so badly was taken from you?

Sad loh.

I had replied the people in charge of the Switzerland Exchange about confirmation, but only yesterday after the person in charge replied me that I realized that I had confirmed with the wrong person.

Now she just took me away from the placement and replaced it with somebody else.

I had wanted to go really badly.

Really badly.

Now what?

I had really looked forward to it; but I guess I'll have to trust God on this. In a way, it was really my muddled headed-ness, but I'm sure that God has something in store me that season that He doesn't want me to leave Singapore.

There's always a reason. And I'll hold on to that in anticipation. God must be preparing something better in store than the Switzerland trip. Wow. I wonder what can be better. Haha.

Well, I'll just have to wait and see.

=)

God is good.

Wow. God is good!

When I started my Technology Entrepreneurship course, I had a desire to one day be mentored under my prof. She's Pamela Lim, a...

Top 10 Singapore Woman Entrepreneur 1999
Singapore’s Most Promising Woman Entrepreneur of the Year 2000
Singapore’s Netrepreneur of the Year 2001
Technical Achievement Award 2000

and guess what, God just opened a door for me!!

I had found out that she was using the same website program as me, Sitesell.com for my website www.leadership-with-you.com. But when I told her, she told me she OWNED the franchise to teach SiteSell in Singapore!!

And she asked me if I was getting a job post grad, and if I was interested to teach Sitesell! (Btw it's a superb web program and worth investing in and to teach even!)

Would I??!?!?!

WOW! To integrate a job and my website business, and work with a multi-millionaire and learn from her!??!?

OF COURSE!! Haha

This is almost like God opening a giant door in my face and saying "THIS WAY!"

Haha. Okay la, I still must pray over it. But I have a feeling it's a big GOGOGO!

Although I'm in class now, I feel like jumping all over the place! Haha.

Distractions of the World

The distractions of the world are what really stops us from entering into the presence of God.

I was really the last chapter of the book Desire I realized that it's what we're really going through in our lives. Like the Israelites, even though God has done so many great things in our lives, it takes us about a few days to totally forget about it. We're distracted.

TV; Newspapers, other things that come along, make us forget.

So John Eldredge suggests that we journal. I find that superb.

When I think about it, if we cut all the distracting nonsense in our lives, TV, newspapers, all the projects we didn't really have to embark on. We have more than enough time for self-reflection, using the PEN to write(instead of blogging).

God spoke to me recently, Yihan, what you really want in your life? If there was one thing in your life you wanted to become, what would it be? Write it down. So that he may run with it; says the Bible.

JOURNAL TIME!

It's the distractions of this world that cause us to desensitize ourselves from the Holy Spirit.

Everything from the TV, our friends, the newspaper, the internet constantly bombards us with messages that affect the way we think and act. So we think we want this and that. But I ask: Really?

Do you really want to learn how to trade stocks? Really? Which part of that appeals to your soul?

Is your greatest passion to 'work in a bank'?

When Chew Yan preached yesterday that men who kiss their wives everyday had some benefits here and there, they are happier, they tend not to have affairs,but it was at the 'men who do that earn 20% more salary than men who dont' that everyone raised their eyebrows and some went 'woooo'.

My first instinct was to scream out, Who is your God?!?

That's why I loved it when Meiqi starting sharing that our giving is not ultimately a trust that God will return the money, but it is an outpouring of a heart that wants to give thanks to God of all His goodness. It's a subtle difference; and it is also truth that God will return it in multiples.

But that's where the heart comes in; are you giving because Money stands above God in your priority? Or are you giving because God stands above it?

The reason why money is such a damnable thing is because it is the closest thing to God in terms of provision. Money can buy alot of things. ALOT.

Really if we ask enough whys about our desires, sometimes we'll find that money is at the end of it. "Because I'll make alot of money."

But of course, no one says that because it's not the correct answer anymore. The correct answer is Because I love it and I find it challenging.

LOL.

Do you REALLY want to work in a bank? Is your soul worth $6,000/mth?
Do you REALLY want to learn to trade options? Is staring at a computer screen watching numbers go up and down your ULTIMATE goal in life? Now I'm not saying that it couldn't be. It could be.

But to have 10% of the school have the same passion? Trading? Banks? Sounds more like cultural influence to me.

And I do not say it because I've got it all figured out too. I find myself struggling in this area too which is the reason I often bring it up.

And it's sad; because I do preach to people to listen to their hearts but today I realized one thing; most people have stopped listening to God in their hearts; they've been so bombarded by all the noise that's out there in the world that they don't even recognize the voice of God anymore.

You can be a Christian and proclaimed to be led by the Holy Spirit, say that you've prayed about it. But are you sure that's God's voice?

The saints of old have learnt to isolate themselves from the world. Jesus went into the desert for 40 days, John the Baptist went into the desert too,... it's there where the noise of the world quietens where the still small voice of God will be heard.

And I'm going Switzerland for 30 days! I have friends that are there already, but deep down inside, I go Switzerland to take myself away from the world, and into a plac where I can find God; so seriously I rather not have any friends there. It would have been easier than having to reject their invitations now.

God, I will find You. No matter how loud the world is. I will learn to quieten my heart and listen.

Why you should read John Eldredge

John Eldredge was an author that revolutionized my life in 2008; and is continually doing so. I have a library of over 100 books, with about 60 Christian books and I consider him the best author, not in terms of expounding the truth, but in terms of the fruit his books produces. It's amazing.

Here are some things I learnt from reading his books. Through his books, I:

1. Learnt how to pray with true fervency. There's a difference between the religious prayer that we usually just let out of our mouth and prayer with true desire. John teaches how the true prayer arises from our heart's desires and how we can truly pray like how the saints of old prayed. And not the cut flower prayers we usually pray.

2. Understood the root of all religious behavior. What John Eldredge calls the practical agnosticism. With our mouths we proclaim Jesus as Lord, but with our lives and our hearts, we live like He isn't there. Learnt that most preaching specifically aimed at behavior dones nothing. To believe that by behaving a certain way makes God more pleased with us is in fact, the beginning of religion. It's our hearts that matter ( yes, heart can produce behavior, but by aiming at behavior we miss the point)

3. Understood the root of all sin. Sin begins when man seeks to fulfil his desires apart from God's plan. Desire is not wrong, but it is the object that we use to fulfil our desires that determines if it is sin or not.

4. Learnt the first sin that was committed by Adam and Eve is still being committed today. Doubting God's heart. Devil tempted Jesus in wilderness. The man who knew God to be a hard man -> sent to the place of weeping and gnashing of teeth.

5. Came into deeper understanding of the way I had related to girls I liked and how it was a question of my identity. And that our identity, or our lack of it is often a source of many problems because we seek to find that identity through earthly things. For guys with absentee fatherhood, mostly women.

6. found a deeper identity in God, and hence became MUCH more secure in who I was. Learnt in my heart never needing to justify my actions to anyone else as a way to show that i'm 'right'.

7. Understood the importance of the role of fatherhood and motherhood in our lives. And how the way they related to you and treated you could shape you for life, and for the negative things like putting you down and stuff, only way out is Jesus. No one else can give me that healing.

8. see the need to grieve for past wounds. Whatever hurts and wounds that were inflicted in our youth needs to be brought out before healing can take place. It means revisiting the incidents that happened that caused these wounds.

9. have finally understood the ache when i saw breathtaking scenery, mountains, trees and lakes. From my youth, I had always experienced this ache, this sweet pain when I saw beautiful sights; never understood why. I finally understand why, we came from Paradise, and we're homesick. These things are mere reminders of the glory to come.

10. developed a heart for poetry. By learning to fully embrace the beauty that was set in nature, i was somehow able to start writing a little poetry; I'm not a master, but I think I do okay at it. Anything's better than nothing. Haha.

11. developed a flair for writing. John Eldredge's got a lovely writing style. He understands that the heart learns through stories and visuals; not through your principle 1,2,3. Those are great, but to produce an true effect in our lives, we have to learn through stories. And through reading his books many times, I kind of developed that flair.

12. become more sensitive to the Holy Spirit as a result. When we appreciate beauty, poetry, stories, life in its fullness, we become sensitive to the Holy Spirit. I have become a person that can tear and get touched very easily. I can watch a movie with a simple point like love, hope, strength.. things like that, and tear.

I watched Forrest Gump and teared like crazy. Haha. It's such a beautiful movie.

It's not about being a crybaby. It's about become in touch with your heart, and with God as a result.

13. finally understood how the saints of old can cry out to God like that and know him as Lover. Go read Madame A Guyon, A W Tozer, Thomas A Kempis, George Macdonald, St John of the Cross to know what I'm talking about. John Wesley too.

14. developed a much more richer, deeper, meaningful, fulfilling relationship with God. I was telling a friend, the point of the Bible is for us to find our way back to God. He was concerned about the 100% accuracy of every thing we were reading, the Greek and the Hebrew; sure, that's important, but the Bible is meant for God to lead us to back to Him. He is the point. The relationship is the point. The Bible is the 6000 year old romance story about how God wants to win our heart back.

SOOOOO.. the point is the heart. NOT the story. (Some people never get it.)

----

Okay, there's more but I'm kinda tired writing all that. Haha enough reason for you to read it.

His books are:

1. Wild at Heart (Read to understand MEN!)
2. Captivating (Read to understand WOMEN!)
3. Desire ( MY FAV!)
4. Scared Romance (First of the many)
5. Waking the Dead
6. The Way of the Wild Heart ( Sequel to Wild at Heart)
7. Walking With God
8. Epic

But seriously, just read all of them. Change your life.

Seriously. Transforms your LIFE!!

What's your Life Strategy?

Interesting question Xinhong told us by Sophia Shing. Amidst all the talk on time management, I think this is what hit me.

What strategy do we have in our lives to achieve the goals in our hearts? How will we play the game in the light of not just the end of our lives, but the life that is to come.

Cos, yes seriously unless we really know what we want in our lives, we can't formulate any strategy or think about how we're going to get through it.

Life, events, happenings don't have meaning unless we understand where is the end. Unless we understand God's general will for all people, and specific will for our lives, everything is really just meaningless around us.

What strategy?

Hmmm, its a little late to think now; maybe tmr! Haha.

Why haven't I blogged for so long?

Honestly, I really don't know.

It's kinda of a seasonal thing. It happens to alot of people; I see alot of my friend's blogs rise and fall in inverse proportion to the time in their hands.

We might really think it's alright, but sometimes blogging is a sign that we are indeed reflecting on our lives constantly. If we've been blogging for a while, and suddenly stop, is it because we want privacy, or have we really lost that time where we did use to reflect?

I was reading Rachel Ma's (www.clamchowderbistro.blogspot.com) blog and I really love her style of writing. I really learnt alot about her during our long trips on the bus in Beijing; just talking about everything under the sun, well, and mostly above. (God. Haha) She's got a really poetic heart and is something I would love to get too.

Poets are spiritual people. To see beauty in life and to put it out in words; that's wonderful. Honestly I don't see much poetic people around. People who can write beautifully; well of course language plays a part; I kinda suck at English (C5) so my poems can't match Rachel's for nuts. But of course, I make an attempt anyway. Haha.

Anyway I digress.

I realized that the reason for not blogging is really a kinda of a dis-orientation. Ever since I got back from Beijing; I just didn't feel like blogging. I do write for my weekly newsletter in Uni-Y: weekly reflections of sorts, but not really the personal kind.

And indeed, it's not that I haven't pondered for a long time; I have. I take walks about 3-4 times at night; just a round around my estate just to enjoy the night breeze and talk to God.

Rachel made a post about a comment I made to her in Beijing, which I thought great to talk more on; How we view God will determine the way we approach Him. Yes indeed, it's beyond prayer, and it's beyond the head knowledge.

Yeah, we all know God is our provider, our shelter, refuge, holy, righteous, loving and all that. But has it gotten into our hearts? When we're in trouble, is our first reaction running to God? Or is our first instinct to another source, alcohol, TV, computer games, someone else?

If it's not God, no, don't blame yourself for taking the wrong action. It's the right thing to do, yes, but you must ask yourself this," How do I see God in my life?"

How we view God will determine the way we approach Him.

Sometimes we don't approach Him because we don't really believe in our hearts that He cares. Now that's important for us to spot. This is called practical agnosticism. We claim to know the loving God, but our hearts think otherwise.

Sometimes it's because we've been hurt from young by apathetic parents; especially in Asian countries. We grew up having our hearts neglected; Results! As and Bs are more important. Face is more important. It's more important that you do well than your overachieving cousin than what you like. What you like don't matter.

These are the kinds of messages we get from young that hinder our approach to God. We subconsciously believe God is like our earthly Father, and that's why we only apporach Him for the 'important' things.

No friends, your heart is the most important thing. Your heart is important to Him.

It's not a matter of right and wrong, but more a question of how we really see God. That's why we need to be true to our hearts. We really need to know this. If we only know how to do the 'right' thing, then we will never see that about ourselves.

Ask God to reveal Himself as Loving Father to you. Ask Him to show you He cares.

You don't become more spiritual by becoming more religiously correct. Or by knowing the Greek and the Hebrew of every word in the Bible. We become more spiritual and when become more in tune with our hearts; we're able to discern the voice of God much better than otherwise.

God loves you. And me. And you betta believe it! He cares. (I'm beginning to question myself, do I really think He cares.)

The closest place to Heaven

"It was so beautiful, you didn't know where earth ended and heaven began." - Forrest Gump

I might be going to Switzerland for Summer Exchange! Woohoo! I was looking through some of the pictures of Switzerland as the Information Session was going on.





I was telling people," I might probably fall in love with the place that I don't ever want to come home anymore."

Phil 1:21-24
For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain. If I am to go on living in the body, this will mean fruitful labor for me. Yet what shall I choose? I do not know! I am torn between the two: I desire to depart and be with Christ, which is better by far; but it is more necessary for you that I remain in the body.

Why do you think people love to travel, love beautiful places like Switzerland. It's the closest thing to Heaven on earth.

I don't think I want to go. I might fall in love with the place. Yet there's still a battle to fight here. I can't leave. God will find me and get me back.

Paradise

From a really young age, I've been dreaming of heaven, even before I was a Christian. And from time to time the ache comes back. The homesick ache.


Ecc 3:11
He has set eternity in our hearts

I'm heading to Switzerland this summer, I hope. Close to heaven. Close, but never there. It will always evade us until we find the true Source.

I typed Paradise on my Google and went on Wiki to check it out.

Wiki:
Paradise is an idealized place in which existence is positive, harmonious and timeless. It is conceptually a counter-image of the miseries of human civilization, and in paradise there is only peace, prosperity, and happiness. Paradise is a place of contentment, but it is not necessarily a land of luxury and idleness.

Paradisaical notions are cross-cultural, often laden with pastoral imagery, and may be cosmogonical or eschatological or both.

In eschatological contexts, paradise is imagined as an abode of the virtuous dead.

In Christian and Islamic understanding heaven is a paradisaical relief, evident for example in the Gospel of Luke when Jesus tells a penitent criminal crucified alongside him that they will be together in paradise that day.

In Native American beliefs, the other-world ia an eternal hunting ground.

In old Egyptian beliefs, the other-world is Aaru, the reed-fields of ideal hunting and fishing grounds where the dead lived after judgment. For the Celts, it was the Fortunate Isle of Mag Mell.

For the classical Greeks, the Elysian fields was a paradisaical land of plenty where the heroic and righteous dead hoped to spend eternity.

The Vedic Indians held that the physical body was destroyed by fire but recreated and reunited in the Third Heaven in a state of bliss.

In the Zoroastrian Avesta, the "Best Existence" and the "House of Song" are places of the righteous dead. On the other hand, in cosmological contexts 'paradise' describes the world before it was tainted by evil.

So for example, the Abrahamic faiths associate paradise with the Garden of Eden, that is, the perfect state of the world prior to the fall from grace.

The concept is a topos' in art and literature, particularly of the pre-Enlightenment era, a well-known representative of which is John Milton's Paradise Lost.


He has truly set eternity in our hearts.

No culture, no man can run from that longing.

The Greatest Dignity of All

He enables us to love. He gives us the greatest treasure in all creation: a heart. For he intends that we should be his intimate allies, to borrow Dan Allender’s phrase, who join in the Sacred Circle of intimacy that is the core of the universe, to share in this great Romance.

Just as we have lost our wonder at the world around us, we have forgotten what a treasure the human heart is. All of the happiness we have ever known and all of the happiness we hope to find is unreachable without a heart. You could not live or love or laugh or cry had God not given you a heart.

And with that heart comes something that just staggers me.

God gives us the freedom to reject him.

He gives to each of us a will of our own.

Good grief, why? He knows what free-willed creatures can do. He has already suffered one massive betrayal in the rebellion of the angels. He knows how we will use our freedom, what misery and suffering, what hell will be unleashed on earth because of our choices. Why? Is he out of his mind?

The answer is as simple and staggering as this: if you want a world where love is real, you must allow each person the freedom to choose.

Happy New Year!

Hmm.

Happy New Year! =)

Man, I cannot find the motivation to write cos like I write once a week already for my Uni-Y Newsletter. Haha.

Anyways school's starting soon, but I'm really looking forward to a glorious 2009 ahead! =)